Ouroboros, by Amaranth Traces

-- Chapter Fourteen --

Author’s note: Thanks again to Jess13 for the Geology assist on this chapter. This one’s for you, Jess!

Daniel took a deep breath. Or rather, his consciousness took a moment to ready itself. It was, of course, both unnecessary and impossible to breathe without a corporeal body. He was grateful that The Others had permitted his ascension after his involvement in Oma’s decision to finally deal with Anubis. He only hoped that she hadn’t been too late.

Even as the question entered his thoughts, the answer came to him. Anubis had been taken out of the picture before he activated the device on Dakara. The galaxy was safe once again.

As he moved through space, nebulous gases glowed with his presence. He passed through a very young system; proto-planets and planetesimals formed a disk surrounding the variable star. A star that Daniel noted with amusement was a type known on Earth as a T-Tauri Star.

But this wasn’t where he needed to be. He left the newborn system behind, heading for a much more familiar one.

Daniel concentrated. He directed all of his attention on an insignificant yellow star that was more than half a galaxy away. As he willed himself closer, he began to refine his focus. Third planet, Northern hemisphere, North America, United States, Colorado... He was almost there. He could see the mountain now. Well, he couldn’t really see it, since he didn’t have any eyes. But Daniel knew it was there. He could sense it.

Three-thousand, three-hundred and seven feet of two-billion year-old fractured granite eased out of Daniel’s path. Vertical foliations of metamorphic rock, formed by the melting and recrystallisation of tectonic plates colliding at the root of the mountain, moved fluidly past him.

He didn’t question how he knew the astronomical and geological details that entered his mind. Just as he didn’t question the fact that he was completely aware of every atom of matter, and every trace of energy that surrounded him.

Again, Daniel narrowed his concentration, flowing easily through alternating layers of concrete and air, this time to a specific section of air on what was known as Sublevel 27.

He was there. He had made it.

There were four familiar presences in the room. Daniel hovered near the ceiling, knowing they weren’t aware of him.

“I still don’t quite understand what happened,” said the woman. He moved closer to her. “One minute Anubis is about to push the button that ends all life in the galaxy, and the next minute he’s just...gone.” The pain, guilt, fear and hope radiated from her in waves.

Daniel reached out, trying to provide comfort, but he couldn’t touch her. No, this just wouldn’t do. He knew he would never be happy like this. The last time had been different, but he still hadn’t been happy. Daniel didn’t plan to remain an ascended being for very long this time. He looked at the woman before him. This was where he needed to be. With her. He knew what he needed to do.

He shifted his thoughts into the next room. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to do what he wanted. Getting here was easy when compared to staying here. Readying himself once more, Daniel gathered all of his concentration.

And descended from a higher plane of existence.

It was dark. Was it supposed to be dark?

Daniel opened his eyes. That was much better. He looked around at the familiar office. He had done it. He knew where he was, and, even more important, he knew who he was. Daniel breathed a sigh of relief. He was back. But something wasn’t quite right.

He looked down at himself and groaned quietly. “Oh, for—”

Teal’c’s voice came from the room next door. “O’Neill believes that Daniel Jackson was somehow responsible.”

“Nope! It wasn’t me!” Daniel said loudly. He squeezed his eyes closed and dropped his chin to his chest as he realised, too late, that given his current state, it probably would have been a better idea to stay quiet until the debriefing in the next room had ended.

“Anybody else hear that?” came Jack’s voice.

Daniel sighed. “I’m in here!”

“That’s Daniel!”

A shadow appeared in the doorway, and Daniel realised that his friend was on his way into his office. “No!” he shouted as Jack poked his head through the door. “Don’t come in!”

“Whoa!”

Daniel squeezed his eyes closed again and groaned, frustrated. How was it possible that he could navigate his way halfway across the entire galaxy but not remember that he’d want to be wearing clothes when he retook human form?

“Hey there!”

He opened his eyes to find Jack quickly backing out of the room. He sighed. “Can you get me...something?” Daniel asked softly.

Jack spun around near the doorway to his office. He tugged the SGC flag off the pole behind him and handed it to Daniel.

“Thank you,” he mumbled as he wrapped the flag around his waist. With a deep breath, Daniel stepped out of the office. He glanced at Jack, who seemed to have taken a sudden interest in studying the flagpole, and then turned to Sam.

Her eyes widened, her mouth making a perfect circle of surprise. She seemed flustered and looked away. Daniel felt the heat of a blush rising up his neck.

“It’s a...” His gaze flickered briefly to the ceiling, trying to come up with a quick explanation for the situation. He failed and looked back at Sam. “Long story.”

She looked at him with a weak grin. He felt her eyes move over his body. In an effort to distract himself from her, he looked back at Jack, who turned quickly away to study a section of wall.

Daniel turned the other way to look through the window back into Jack’s office. He could practically feel Sam’s gaze still on him. Glancing over at her, he saw she was smiling, although the expression in her eyes was one of sadness. She stood up, walked quickly forward, and threw her arms around him, hugging him tightly.

Daniel shifted his grip on the flag so he could hold it in place with one hand and wrapped his other arm around Sam.

“I knew you’d be back,” he heard her whisper. She pulled away, and he saw tears shining in her eyes. Her expression was an odd mixture of fear and joy.

“It pleases me to no end to see you alive and well, Daniel Jackson.”

Daniel tore his eyes away from Sam to look at his Jaffa friend. “Thanks, Teal’c. It’s good to be back. Again.”

“So, if it wasn’t you, who was it?”

“Uh, I’d be happy to explain everything, Jack, but could I get some clothes first?”

“I’ll go get you something,” said Sam, already almost out the door.

Daniel smiled gratefully at her as she glanced at him before leaving.

They waited for several minutes in silence, Daniel shifting uncomfortably in the SGC flag.

Jack sat down and tapped his fingers noisily on the table. “Daniel, the suspense is killing me here. Spill.”

Daniel took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Oma ascended me. Well, partially, anyway.” He bobbed his head back and forth. “You know how it is. I had to release what held me to this life and all that.”

“Clearly that didn’t stick.”

Daniel grinned. “Yeah, well. I ran into Anubis and learned what he was planning. Once I figured out who he was, I tried to stop him. But I couldn’t, because I wasn’t fully ascended yet.”

“So, who stopped him?”

“Oma.” Daniel answered simply. He shifted his grip on the flag again. “I have no concept of how long I was there. Time is...weird on that plane of existence. It’s hard to keep track of it.” He shrugged.

“It has been more than a week since we activated the device on Dakara,” said Teal’c.

“A week?” Daniel puffed out his cheeks as he exhaled. “Wow. Better than a year, I suppose. Anyway, I guess, during our time together, I convinced her that something had to be done. I’d have done it myself, if I could.”

“And she did...what, exactly?” Jack waved his hands back and forth in front of him.

“She fought him.”

“And won?” Jack’s eyebrows shot up on his forehead. “Huh. Guess she was more powerful than she looked.”

“She didn’t win, Jack. She’ll never win. But neither will Anubis.”

Teal’c bowed his head gravely. “She will battle him for all eternity.”

Daniel nodded. “I don’t think she’ll be able to help us ever again.”

“Right,” said Jack. “‘Cause she’s been an enormous help so far.”

“Well, she’s saved my life twice now. I think that’s pretty helpful.”

“Yes, well.” Jack rolled his eyes. “There is that.”

The briefing room door swung open and Daniel clutched the flag tighter around his waist. Sam stepped inside, carrying some clothes for him. He had never been so happy to see that blue uniform. “Oh, thank you,” he said.

Sam gave him an odd look as she handed him his clothes. Daniel studied her carefully. Something was definitely bothering her. No, it was more than that. She looked like she was scared to death. It wasn’t an expression that Daniel saw on Sam very often.

“I’ll just wait outside,” she said softly.

Daniel nodded. “Thanks.” He’d figure out whatever was bothering her once they had some time alone. And he was fully clothed.

Jack cleared his throat. “I think it’s best if we all wait outside.”

Daniel would have laughed if he hadn’t been so worried about Sam’s obvious distress. “Good plan, Jack.” He was pretty sure that Jack had been even more embarrassed to discover Daniel’s attire – or lack thereof – than Daniel had been.

His friends went out in the hall, leaving him to get dressed in relative privacy. He finished quickly and opened the door to join them.

Jack stepped forward and squeezed Daniel’s shoulder, smiling. “That’s much better.”

“No kidding,” Daniel agreed.

“Daniel Jackson,” said Bra’tac. “I am most pleased that you have returned. I wish I could remain longer, but I must return to Dakara.”

Teal’c nodded. “I will accompany you to the stargate, old friend. There is much work to be done.”

Jack waved as Teal’c and Bra’tac walked down the hall together. “Have fun you two.” He turned back to Daniel. “Okay. We need to get you to the infirmary.”

Daniel really didn’t want to be poked and prodded by doctors right away. He knew he’d have to go eventually, but he hoped that he could postpone it for a little while. “I feel fine, Jack.”

“I’m sure you do. But you’ve been dead for more than a week, so you understand why I’d like to get a professional’s opinion that you are, in fact, fine.”

Daniel glanced at Sam. Her gaze was firmly fixed on the floor. He decided that the sooner he could get the infirmary visit out of the way, the sooner he could get to the bottom of what was bothering her. “Alright,” he said. “I’m going.”

“Good. Let’s go.”

The three of them headed down the hall in the direction of the infirmary, but before they even rounded the first corner, a voice caused them to stop.

“Uh, General?” said Walter Harriman.

“Yes, Sergeant?”

“Um, there’s a small problem with SG-7, sir.” He nodded to Daniel. “Welcome back, Doctor Jackson.”

Daniel grinned, amazed that nothing ever seemed to faze Walter. “Thanks.”

“What kind of problem?” asked Jack.

“Well, sir, you remember that blue slime they were covered in when they returned from their mission the other day? Uh, they’ve been getting regular check-ups to make sure there aren’t any lasting effects, and, um...”

“Yes?”

Walter cleared his throat nervously. “It–it seems that the members of SG-7 have developed a certain, uh, repulsion for metallic objects, sir. One of them sent half the cutlery in the commissary flying across the room. They’re in the research lab with Doctors Lee and Carmichael now.”

Jack groaned. “Magnets. It’s always magnets.” He turned back to face Sam and Daniel. “No rest for the wicked. Carter, you make sure that Daniel sees a doctor right away.”

Sam nodded silently. Daniel watched her, worried.

“And Daniel?”

He looked up, raising his eyebrows. “Jack?”

“I’m glad you’re back.”

Daniel glanced at Sam and smiled. “Me too.”

With Jack on the way to resolve the emergency with SG-7, Sam and Daniel headed for the infirmary. He couldn’t help but send the occasional worried glance in Sam’s direction as they walked. She had been very quiet and was currently studying the lines painted on the floor as if they would reveal the secrets of the universe.

Even though he knew that he should wait until they were somewhere less public to talk to her, Daniel couldn’t stop him self from asking, “You okay?”

She looked up at him with a very fake smile and nodded before turning her gaze to the floor again. Daniel frowned but decided he could wait. He just hoped that the visit to the infirmary wouldn’t take too long.

The conversation between two airmen near the door to the infirmary caught Daniel’s attention.

“Seriously,” said one of them. “I saw it with my own eyes. Every time Lieutenant Prebble reached for a fork, it darted across the table away from him all by itself. Nearly skewered a marine. I’ve never seen anything like it! And I’ve seen my fair share of strange things on this base.”

“They should have plastic utensils in the commissary,” said the second airman. “I’ve been saying that for months now.”

Daniel gave the airmen a wary look as he and Sam entered the infirmary. He was examined, had some blood samples taken, his memory tested and was then declared officially living. Not wanting to give the doctors time to change that prognosis, Daniel hurried out of the infirmary with Sam, heading toward his office.

Once they arrived, Daniel closed and locked the door. They could talk about whatever was bothering Sam without interruption. He turned to face her and was surprised to see that she was standing near his desk with her back to him.

When she spoke, he could barely hear her. “You still have all of your memories.”

Daniel felt a wave of relief wash over him. Was that what she had been so worried about? “Yeah,” he said, smiling.

Suddenly, her knees buckled, and Daniel reached out to catch her before he realised she was going to land in a chair. He walked around and knelt on the floor in front of her, worried again. Her eyes were squeezed closed, and she held her head in her hands. He put a gentle hand on her arm, looking at her imploringly.

“Sam, what’s wrong?”

Her eyes opened and Daniel felt his heart ache as he saw the pain and tears within them.

“Daniel, I’m so sorry.”

He gathered her into his arms, holding her tenderly, but not understanding why she was apologising. “For what?”

“It was me. I killed you.”

Oh God. How did she know? He never wanted her to know what her Replicator double had done. He pulled away slightly, looking at her steadily. “No you didn’t,” he said firmly. He had to make her understand that he didn’t hold her responsible for what the Replicator had done. “She wasn’t you.”

She blinked. “What?”

Crap. What had he been thinking? She couldn’t have possibly known what the Replicator had done. Why had he thought she had figured it out? Daniel back-pedalled, hoping she’d forget his slip. “You didn’t kill me, Sam.”

“I did. I helped calibrate the device, and I told my dad to activate it. It destroyed the ship you were on. I knew you were out there, and I did it anyway.”

No wonder she was so upset. He wanted to tell her that he had been dead before the ship had been destroyed, but that would require that he tell her how he had died in the first place. And he didn’t want her to know that. “Sam, you did what you had to do. You saved the galaxy.” Daniel smiled at her. “And I’m fine.”

“I’m sorry,” she said softly.

He rubbed her back, trying to soothe her. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“I should have found another way.”

“There wasn’t time.”

“I could have—”

“Sam, stop.” Daniel placed his hands firmly on her shoulders and locked his eyes on hers. “Don’t do this to yourself.” He looked at her imploringly. “Please. You did what needed to be done. It was the right thing to do.”

After a long moment, Sam nodded. Relieved, Daniel gathered her into a hug again. He closed his eyes, taking in every detail. The feel of her in his arms, the light fruity scent of her hair, the warmth of her body. All too soon, Sam pulled away and looked up at him. Daniel smiled softly, brushing her tears from her cheeks.

“You okay?” he asked.

“You’re alive.” She nodded. “I’m okay.”

He smiled again as she ran her hand through her hair. He was relieved to see some of the fear and pain leave her face. Suddenly, her expression changed to one of curious confusion.

“What did you mean ‘she wasn’t you’?”

Daniel’s heart dropped in his chest. “Nothing, Sam. Never mind.” He hoped that she’d forget his careless comment and let it go. As he watched her frown, though, he knew she wouldn’t. And he knew she was going to figure it out, even if he didn’t say anything.

Her eyes widened, and she scrambled out of the chair, backing away from him. “Oh God.”

Daniel silently cursed himself for not thinking before he spoke. She didn’t need to know, and now she did. At least, Daniel was pretty sure she did. He stood and approached slowly, reaching out to her. “Sam, please.”

She raised her hands, keeping him at a distance. He stopped, but watched her intently. “She killed you.” Her voice was hoarse.

Involuntarily, Daniel winced. He immediately regretted it. If she hadn’t known before, he had just confirmed her suspicions.

Sam’s expression contorted in horror. “How?”

Daniel shook his head, determined to convince her to drop the subject. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Tell me.”

Daniel searched her face. He should have known better than to think that she’d be willing to let the topic go. He sighed and decided to just tell her the truth. At least since she was finding out now, he could make sure that she knew he didn’t blame her.

“It was very...Terminator-esque. Her arm became a blade and she, uh, ran me through.” He shrugged, studying her reaction. “She was, ah, a little angry with me.” Hello. Understatement.

Her beautiful blue eyes were hollow with fear and dread. “How can you look at me and not see the person who killed you?”

“She wasn’t you, Sam.” He had to find a way to make her understand that simple fact. It was something Daniel had easily been reminded of every minute he was with her double. He knew she wasn’t his friend. Nothing about her was anything like Sam. She had to understand that.

“Wasn’t she? She had my thoughts, my memories, my feelings. What are any of us besides that?” She uttered a wild laugh that caused Daniel’s concern for her to grow even more. “She thinks, therefore she is me.” She raised her hand to touch her forehead.

Daniel’s heart ached when he saw how badly her hand was trembling. He took another step forward and tentatively touched her arm.

With a soft cry, she jerked away from him, pressing her back against the wall. “How can you touch me? I killed you!” she screamed. “Twice over!” She wrapped her arms around her waist in a self-hug that Daniel recognised as one of his own habits.

Daniel stepped forward again, trying desperately to calm her. “Sam, she wasn’t you.”

He reached out just in time to catch her as she started to slide down the wall. His arms around her, they edged gently down to the floor together. Daniel breathed a sigh of relief when Sam’s arms wrapped around his waist, happy that he had managed to get through to her.

“She wasn’t you,” he murmured into her hair, holding her tightly in an effort to keep her from flying apart. He stroked her hair and continued his attempts to calm her as she cried in his arms. “Don’t you realise that everything about you just further demonstrates how unlike her you really are?”

Daniel rubbed her back as her breathing gradually returned to normal. She drew a shuddering breath and released it slowly.

“Daniel?”

She didn’t lift her head, so he contentedly remained still, his cheek resting on the top of her head. “Hmm?”

“I missed you.”

Daniel smiled. That was more like it. He pulled back to make sure that her expression matched her verbal stability and was pleased to see that it did. “I missed you, too.”

“I knew you’d come back. What I didn’t know is if you’d hate me once you did.”

Well now, that was just silly. “I could never hate you, Sam,” he said. Daniel brushed a lock of hair off her forehead and gazed at her adoringly. He wanted to tell her why he had come back. He had to tell her.

“How is it that you managed to come back with all your memories this time?” Her red-rimmed eyes searched his. “After the countdown stopped, I was trying to think of all the places The Others might have sent you for interfering.”

“Well, I didn’t interfere this time. It was all Oma. So, when I ascended, I was able to choose to take human form again. I guess I was able to keep my memories and choose where I went because descending wasn’t a punishment this time.”

“So you’re here because you want to be here?”

There was more to it than that, but he nodded. Sam’s lips curved up in a slight smile. She was beautiful, even with her nose and eyes all red and puffy from crying. Her teeth raked over her bottom lip for a moment, her eyes on his. She opened her mouth as if to say something, but then sighed and looked away. Daniel watched as Sam squeezed her eyes closed in what seemed like pain.

He swallowed the lump in his throat. He had to tell her the real reason he had come back. Maybe if she knew, she would believe that he didn’t hold her responsible for the actions of her Replicator double.

“Sam,” he said softly. Her eyes met his. Daniel felt his heart pounding in his chest. All he had to do was tell her. “The truth is...” He took a deep breath. “I’m—”

“Doctor Jackson?” Someone knocked loudly on the door.

Daniel looked at the door and then back at Sam. She ran a hand through her hair and appeared to quickly recompose herself. He helped her up and opened the door. An airman stood in the hallway, holding a crate.

“Yes?”

“Sorry to disturb you, sir. This just arrived, and General O’Neill said I should bring it to you.”

Well, that just figured. Daniel glanced at Sam again before turning his attention back to the airman and the crate he was carrying. “What is it?”

“I don’t know, sir. It just arrived from Egypt.”

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